Can childhood abuse from a father affect intimate r/ships?

Question

Do you think childhood rejection affects intimate r/ships?
Am seeing a wonderful guy. When I am with him I feel so close and can feel that he adores me. However he will never tell me how he feels. Interestingly enough he wants to know how I feel. When I state you don't give much back he says what do you mean. If often waits for me to text or email then if i haven't after a week he will initiate contact. Then first night I met him he said he hadn't ever had a serious r/ship(he's 25). I told him I didn't think he would form a loving r/ship until he resolves the issues with his father. He said but I don't want to see him. I said you don't have to to resolve it. He then became angry. Do you think this guy is capable of ever expressing his emotions?

Answer 1

You can't make him do it and it can have a affect on any type of relationship. I speak from personal experience on this. I can not even think about my family without feel hate inside. I have been working with a therapist for over a year to get through this. I can tell you he may not show it openly that he cares or carry his emotions on his sleeve. He may even get angry quick but if you watch there will be signs he cares. If you stick by him and not push him he will respect you for it. But if you can not do that you have to talk to him and resolve it together. It will be tough. god bless my wife for standing as far as you could with me.

Answer 2

Our childhood and family relationship definately teach us how to express our feelings. If he had problems with his father and they didn't show their feelings towards one another, that will carry itself over to his adult relationships. We all show love and affection in different ways. Does he do things for you? Does he give you little gifts or do chores or fix things for you to make your life easier? Does he spend a lot of quality time together? Or hug, touch you often? It sounds like you need someone to tell you they love you for you to know it. But since he's not a talker you think he doesn't love you. He may be showing his love for you in other ways. You need to look real close and see if you can recongnize the way he shows his love. He may never resolve issues with his father, but that doesn't mean you two can't have a good relationship. You need to tell him that while you understand he shows his love for you in other ways, you still need to hear it once and a while.

Answer 3

Yes, but you may need to show him. Try not to bring the subject up, but if it does, be supportive instead of asking questions about something your boyfriend is obviously not ready to share. If he still contacts you after a week of you not doing so (like you say), it sounds as though he does at least care. He needs to be able to grow and trust in you for the relationship to eventually move on, but it might take time.

Answer 4

unresolved parental conflict will definitely affect relationships..

Answer 5

Yes it can.