feeling depressed all the time?

Question

hello,
im 15 and i feel really really depressed like all the time, i feel like my future is hopeless and feel pretty lonely,
ive had a lot of crap happen in my life when i was lil i was sexually abused my a close family member when i was little, my mum and dad split when i was 7 and i now live with my mum+brothers, i used to always see my dad but he has a girlfriend 20 years younger then him and they have a little girl i always feel like second best to him he never calls anymore, i used to always see him then last november i had a massive fight this his girlfriend cause she treated me like my sisters baby sitter,
i have friends up there which i never see anymore and ive recently made a new friend with someone who's had a bad life too we've become best friends,my brothers hate my dad but i miss him so much and im always the one who has to call him and he never puts the effort to see us anymore by mum has a boyfriend who is really nice and he has sons too and he treats us like him o wn, since this year started ive felt lonely and depressed ive recently been cutting myself on my arms which no body knows about not even my bestfriend it doesnt even make me feel btetter( well at the time it does, me and mymum have not been as close as we used to this year, i feel like she never cares its like shes hates me i want to be a dancer so bad and shes never gave me the support i need ive wanted to go to a dance school fpr years but she take no notice when i mention it she laughs at me and ive had loads of exams latley and she never wishes me luck ever! i just feel like im on my own and ive got none becaeuse my dad never sees me and my mum never listens to me, and my bestfriend goes counciling and i spoke to a women the othernday and she said i could get counciling, and my mum doesnt haave to know do you think it would be for best if she doesnt know? because ive tried asking her before but she screwed at me saying i dont need it, but all my brothers have had it and ive had worser then them, sometimes i'll jsut get visions of killing myself and one second i'll be fine and the next i'll just want to die, i always feel like i never fit in at school and if someone says one lil thing like taking the piss i'll just want to cryand ive also been very obsessed with babys like all i think about is babiesand sometimes i'll just stare in the mirror at my belly and pray to have a baby....., ive also recently had problems with a boy which has taken a big turn and made me worser i just dont know what to do anymore, if anybody can give me an awnser please i would be ver greatful and im sorry about the essay just want the best awnsers as possible thanks x

Answer 1

Hi,



I think hunny it's really important that you talk to someone, if you think your mum is not going to let you, don't tell her, (I'm not saying lie to her, but YOU need to talk to someone). Being depressed is often brushed under the carpet as nothing to worry about, having had depression I know how serious it can become. It sounds to me that it already has become very serious, harming yourself is not something you need to carry on with (I have a scar from it, it gets me back down every time I look at it).



What I think you should do is:



1. Go straight to your GP.ASAP & it is very important that you tell them everything

They will not tell your parents. They will not judge you. They will happily listen to you, if you find it difficult explaining take a print out of the question you have put here. Then they will be able to start to get you on the road to recovery.



2. Your Parents need to be told how you feel

Your dad needs to know that he is making you feel unimportant and like he doesn't care. However you do it (phone, letter, email) just do it, it will make you feel a lot better and give him a kick up the bum.

Your mum should appreciate you more, talk to her. Or it sounds like you get on well with her boyfriend, ask him if you can talk to him, maybe in confidence. (I know this is easier said than done, but it needs doing for you to get the support you need to start getting better)



3. Stick to your dreams of dancing. If it's something you really love you should never give up on it. Do it as much as you have time for. Use it as a release when you are feeling low.



4. You need to keep a focus on your school work, when you are better, having some good grades OR some decent references from teachers will mean that you will have more posibilies in getting into a college or university (studying dance with any luck :-] )



Keep your chin up, you are an incredibly strong person, you have been through so much for someone who is so young and you are truly amazing. You're also going through puberty & the feeling of being desperate for a baby at your age is completely normally, just don't act on it lol.



Boys are always trouble, mine certainly is, lived with him for 3 years, has been trouble since the day I met him. Only you know what you can do about that, if you want any more help on it, put more details. Just don't let any boy add to your problems, most the time they are seriously just not worth it. And anyone who takes piss out of you at school, don't give them the satisfaction, they are very little people. You wanna cry, go ahead, get it out, just try not to do it in front of them.



Seriously, book into the doctors first thing in the morning or talk to the lady you spoke to. You need someone to confide in, let someone share your problems and feelings and help you find a way through this.



Seriously wishing you all the best.



Good luck & focus on yourself for a bit



xxx

Answer 2

I feel so sorry for you, I have been thinking of what to say to make you feel better or at least give you some hope. I strongly believe in God and that gives me peace in my heart. Do you believe in God? Even if you do believe sometimes it is not enough. It helps to talk, it helps to tell someone and maybe even tell your mum and your brothers, even if nothing changes at least you have said it. Maybe the most important thing i can say is this. Nothing that is happening around you is your fault, you are not to blame for anything, never for one minute think that you have done something wrong, you haven't. Unfortunately people around you are not taking notice of your hurt, but that is ok, you know why? Because you can and you know how to find help, you came online and you requested help, you will go to this counselling, there are steps that must be taken that your counsellor will guide you. Be strong, take one step at a time, you have seen that quite a few people responded so you are not alone, we are here supporting you. You go girl, make your change. You are beautiful, with a great heart, so the good times are coming, just go to this counsellor, go to the emergency hospital, go to your gp, but do something, ask for help! No more cutting, because it hurts, and you don't want to hurt anymore.

Answer 3

You need to stop cutting yourself even if its hard you need to stop, Try and forget about your past pretend it never happened its hard but you can train your mind to slowly let go and forget, YOu should go and see your doctor so you can get antidepressants they should also help you, As for your mom and dad well their is a saying "What comes around goes around" so in the future when they need you for somethinJustut ignore it and tell them where you their when i was in need?, So you want to become a dancer? Well after your exams you should consider taking dance lessons or something that can put you on the right path to something what will make you happy.

Answer 4

It sounds like you've definitely had a bad one, I'm sorry for that.



My motto, whenever I feel down, is that: 'There is always someone worse off', it helps. It helps me to take my mind off of what is happening and focus on something else. Indulge in a hobby, like dancing, maybe just in your room. Give yourself a break! Just focus on that and let everything else wash away for a time, instead of spending time cutting yourself and thinking about things like that.



To be honest, I know how you feel (my dad is a **** too), just stick in there. By the way, I'm fifteen too.

Answer 5

specific form of that... You made a good question. i'm able to word it to my self, in till now time... in case you have experienced a monotonous atmosphere or in spite of, undesirable acquaintances and which you seeem to finally end up in problems etc time after time, then you would have been mentally numbed in a fashion you ignore that the way you reside, isn't a good one. in case you have struggled and it has grow to be a comfortable development. you will desire to be happy, you will desire to sense convenience, you be chuffed and snort, you will desire to love somebody and be enjoyed. If someone has been this "numbed", it may take a little time to re-benefit the open expertise approximately it, it ought to start with extra or vibrant dreaming and anxiousness etc. that's, now for you, a step on your existence, an perception, a minimum of perception which you fairly % or would desire to % extra insights. as quickly as you have this expertise, you will desire to think of which you do no longer understand what to do. Then basically think of, i do no longer understand what and how yet I want i'm able to. so you might form of reprogram your self. and since the strategies won't be there no longer, to reprogram the vison of paths you may % bla bla bla (!) in spite of in case you do no longer sense depressed, think of technically then, the way you reside, is it a fashion which will lead you on, or are you status nevertheless? care to tell extra?

Answer 6

I know it will sounds really harsh, but looks like your dad doesn't give a **** about you anymore. Do what you do, but don't kill yourself or cut yourself. its not going to change anything. and im the same ages as you now.

I really do feel sorry for you..

And if you have nice brother/s maybe you can try talking to them.? or if they ara having their own life maybe you can live with them? just an idea. maybe not for the all the time, but maybe like month. just to feel some change.

I know you miss your dad, but maybe you need to ignore him for a wile, and then see if he still remembers you, but if he doesnt, then he is not a good dad.

sorry about that.. x